O, Sir, you are old,

Nature in you,

Stands on the very verge,

Of her confine.

— Shakespeare, King Lear 11, 4

WHEN a woman tells you that, it's bound to hurt. Those words were uttered by King Lear's daughter in criticism, but Shakespeare or not, if a woman tells that to a man, then he must take stock of himself, look in the mirror, check his many years, for he is age-challenged.

In this world of political correctness, we are no longer allowed to call a spade a spade and cannot refer to people in the old way. No longer is a man short, but instead he is vertically challenged. No longer is a man a b...y man, he is now gay, in touch with his sexuality... and yours too... if you're a man. Women are no longer ugly, but are now homely, and children no longer dunce but simply educationally challenged.

The disabled no longer exist, but are physically challenged, and as for the race of negroes, they have been given more names than found on a Scrabble board. They were black, negroid, darkies, African, then African-American if they live in the USA. Well, if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and looks like a duck, then chances are it is a duck, and no fancy names and sugar coating with polite euphemisms will make it into a swan.

So, no longer are people referred to as old, but rather age-challenged. At least that's what some ladies told me as they were discussing how people age and what happens in the process. We'll find out more about the age-challenged, right after these responses.

Hi Tony,

I totally agree with your footnote about Jamaican fruits. They have more antioxidants than North American fruits. We are able to find all the Jamaican fruits and foods here in Toronto and surrounding areas. There is an abundance of Caribbean food stores in the greater Toronto area and I shop for them whenever I get the chance. The exception is what we used to call Ethiopian (eatie oatie) apples. I have never seen them here in the 35 years that I have lived here. They are my favourite.

Wickham

Toronto, Canada

Tony,

Emotional infidelity is real. Not because a man does not put his you know what into another woman's you know where, means that he is not cheating. The physical act can be meaningless, and that's why men can buy prostitutes without even a thought. But when he becomes attached to another woman, even if there is no sex involved, then he has no time or space for me. That hurts even more.

Caroline

I learned just a few weeks ago that the late president John F Kennedy allegedly had a 19-year-old intern at the White House as his lover. She's now 69 years old and has written a book about her 18-month affair. This was all over the USA news and also sparked a discussion among some ladies who viewed that act with contempt and disgust, saying that older men refuse to act their age when they take up with these young girls, and have been preying on them from the dawn of time.

"Imagine that, at his age too. Doesn't he know that he's age-challenged?" In other words, he's too old for her. Admittedly, that was the first time I was hearing that term. I also saw another story that involved the break-up and impending divorce of movie stars Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore. He is 34 years old, and she is bordering on 50. She is still a beautiful woman, but a 34-year-old man has lots of fish to fry and does not want to be stuck with someone who could be his aunty. I saw this coming from they first got married.

Combine this with the fact that he is surrounded by all these young, beautiful and willing starlets in Hollywood, and you have a recipe for disaster. "Why did she marry him in the first place, didn't she know that she was age-challenged and that he would leave her after a while?" So said the ladies, who did not take kindly to the practice of either gender not sticking to spouses who fall within their own decade.

But age is just a number, the saying goes. Plus 40 is the new 20, and 50 the new 30. That may be true in some cases, and in fact, what 50-year-olds are doing nowadays, 30-year-olds could not do back in the day. The danger lies in putting a 50-year-old with a 30-year-old, as the age challenge is just too great.

The sands of time move, and one day all of us will become age-challenged if we are blessed, or cursed with growing old. Yes, being age-challenged can be a blessing but it can also be a curse depending on what happens along the way and how great the challenges are. "Growing old is no fun," said some age-challenged people to whom I spoke. "And people treat you like you have no sense."

I had to get the facts from the source, and where better to go than to the horses themselves, to hear it from their mouths. Yes, I surrounded myself with old... er... make that geriatric... no... make that age-challenged people who shared their stories.

The women seemed to be more sensitive about being age-challenged, as somehow they thought it impacted on their attractiveness, sexuality and self-esteem. The common perception was that as they became more age- challenged, then men would no longer find them appealing. So they try to wring every year, every month, every week and day, out of whatever youthfulness that they have left in them.

"Let's face it, Mr Robinson, after 50 or 60, no man is going to look at me in the same way as when I was 30, unless he wants to drive my car or borrow money from me." Of course, there are notable exceptions, as there are quite a few women who are still knockouts, even though one could say that they are age-challenged. Their secret is, no one knows their real age, and you could never guess it. They are 50, but look 35. They are truly blessed.

As I listened, I learned even more stuff and garnered information that was all new to me. I noticed that a few of the ladies were fanning vigorously, even though the temperature was cool. When I looked on quizzically, they laughed and said, "Oh, we have our own personal summer." To wit, hot flashes associated with menopause. That's one downside of the age-challenged, as ladies of a certain age tend to suffer from this malady.

"I don't know what is worse, the monthly periods or the hot flashes. Women have challenges at whatever age," said one lady. "It can be no fun, as these flashes come and go as suddenly as a summer breeze. In fact, it's more like a summer with no breeze." Those were a few of the downsides to the age-challenged as far as the ladies were concerned. But the men, too, had their stories.

Men tend to try to hold on to their youth longer than women, and often end up looking like fools. After all, the term mid-life crisis is aptly applied to men more than women, and it is a crisis indeed. The men who are age- challenged did not readily admit to being so and would not divulge their real ages. But looking on even at a glance, one could still tell that they were no longer pups, but they were old dogs, long in the tooth and short on brains.

The term age-challenged certainly applies, as they face so many challenges, even as they attempt to be with women, make that girls, who are 30 years their junior. Still, one even boasted to me how the 18-year-old girls think that he's in his 30s, even though he's way past 60. Admittedly, he did look good for his age, and being small bodied gave him a boyish look... but remember, the qualifying words are... for his age. When someone tells you that you look good for your age, what they're really saying is that you are age-challenged. If they say that you look good... then that's a compliment, but those last three words just take it all back.

So the sex may be good, but the recovery time takes a little longer than a young man's, hence the term, age-challenged, but that may suit some women, who really prefer a long, slow drive over a staccato, sputtering start and stop journey any day. "Those old dogs may not learn any new tricks, but the old tricks that they have can rock your world," according to one lady.

We see so many men in their 70s marrying women in their 30s it makes you wonder, "What were they thinking?" I saw a friend of mine recently who is older than his stepmother, as his father took unto himself a very young bride. Now what does he call her? Certainly not Mommy!

Now, even the women who are age-challenged have jumped into the fray, dived into the fountain of youth, tasted the young, succulent fruit that was once forbidden. They call her cougar, which is yet another name for the age-challenged. Society dictates that the women do not get the same treatment as the men, for even though a man is labelled age-challenged when he squires a younger woman, an age-challenged woman is ridiculed even more. Is it because it seems to be unnatural and goes against the normal scheme of things why these names are given to it?

But whichever way you cut it, with age comes challenges; the body wears out and parts deteriorate, although this varies from person to person. Yet some people just seem to add to these challenges as they grow older. We watch our parents age and eventually disappear, we see our family evolving as a new generation grows up to take the place of the older ones. We watch old friends pass away. After a while we all become age-challenged. The trick is not being a fool as you grow up.

The elderly should be respected for all that they have achieved, their wisdom and their experience. But all that is tarnished when they refuse to wear their coat of respectability and are referred to derisively as age-challenged, which is just a notch above age-impaired.

More time.

seido1@hotmail.com

Footnote: I was listening to a radio programme hosted by Leahcim Semaj that discussed the Jamaican film industry. Now, this is my passion, as I have been a film and television producer/director for more than half of my life. It disturbed me to hear of the problems that young and older film producers are experiencing. But I also learned that some mavericks were achieving much in their own quiet way as they found markets in which to showcase their products as far away as Africa. Brilliant.

Which brings me to a legend in the film and television industry, Cynthia Wilmot, who was at the Jamaica Information Service (JIS) long before I went there, and is a person from whom I learnt a great deal. Cynthia is now 90 years old and still practices her craft. There is also Carey Robinson, no relation, but my first boss at JIS, who, despite his own challenges, still soldiers on with Hill and Gully Ride.

Nuff respect to these stalwarts of the film and TV industry.

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